Monday, May 16, 2011

Yet another thing I thought I'd never do.

I have been ridiculously tired lately. I've always had a pretty bad caffeine habit, but I think I've had more coffee since Easter than I've had in all previous years combined. I'm not even kidding. I remember T. saying once that I should try to get to daily Mass. Daily Mass in our parish is at 8:30 a.m. at the latest. And I said, "I love church and everything, but that is really ridiculously early." I live half an hour from everywhere, which includes my church. In order to get to Mass by 8:30, I have to set my alarm for 6:40, which allows me, in an emergency, to hit the snooze button three times and still get to church on time if I put my make-up on at stop lights.

Here's how I know this: I've been going to daily Mass. I never thought I would get up that early, especially when I don't have to be at work until noon, but ever since I found out how truly awesome Mass is, I've wanted to go every day. Of course I can't afford the gas for that, so I go on days I work since I have to be in town anyway. Hence the newfound love of coffee. I don't get up and moving early enough to get my caffeine fix before the one hour fast starts, so I yawn my way through Mass (I'm not alone: Father M. has a rather contagious yawning habit) and enjoy every minute of it. Have I mentioned how awesome the Eucharist is? And then since I don't have to work until 12, I usually pop over to Tim Horton's for a delicious cup of black coffee and a lovely, cheap breakfast. Then I can go to the library or take a walk or learn Italian until work.

Days are so productive when they start early! But I'm a natural night owl, and even when I've been up for eighteen hours or I have to get up early again the next day, I have a hard time going to bed at a decent hour. So it starts all over again with the snooze alarm and the yawning and so, so much coffee. Case in point, it's about 12:45, this is my third blog post of the night, and I have to work tomorrow, which normally means I'd be getting up at 6:40ish. The reason this is my third blog post is because I had a huge gap between posts this week: by the time I got to my computer, I was too exhausted to think. The only reason I'm still awake right now is because I had half an energy drink with dinner and it's only just wearing off. I feel like I should sleep until 10 or so tomorrow, just to catch up and start the week off right. But I feel guilty, because if I have an opportunity to go to Mass, why wouldn't I take it?

I know I'm only obliged on Sundays, but to me, Mass is a privilege. We don't all grow up with regular sacraments. I never knew what I was missing until I was allowed to fully participate in them. I might should catch up on my sleep, but then again, that's what coffee's for, isn't it?

I think I just talked myself out of nine hours of sleep. What have I become?!

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